Western Australia
10th November 2008
Dear New Inventors
I greatly admire your show and it’s always been my dream to star on it someday. (As well as being on Young Talent Time but sadly I never made it to an audition.) I would love it if you would feature my invention called the Exit Toy Storage Box (see attached diagram) which works along similar lines to Exit Mould except that my invention doesn’t involve chemicals, spray action, or mould.
What does my invention do?
It permanently tidies up toys that children leave all over the loungeroom.
What problem does my invention solve?
Having to pick up toys more than once.
In what industry is my invention intended to be used?
It is primarily intended to be used in the domestic realm but it might also find market openings in childcare and house share.
What stage is my development at?
The invention is at its final stages. I am just experiencing a few minor safety issues.
I hope you will like my invention
Yours sincerely,
Poetsquib
19 responses so far ↓
1 Kath Lockett // Nov 10, 2008 at 3:43 pm
I will buy two please
2 franzy // Nov 10, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Is the by-product recyclable? Perhaps as “Mini-Figurine Puzzles”?
3 squib // Nov 10, 2008 at 4:33 pm
Kath if you buy ten, you get one free
Franz you’re really quite evil. No, the by-product never becomes crap again. It turns into colourful mulch for your garden
4 daiskmeliadorn // Nov 10, 2008 at 5:02 pm
I am shocked at this blatant anti-worker exercise which will take what began with the industrial revolution one cruel, union-busting step further, and in these difficult economic times as well.
I myself was once employed to pick up children’s toys. My duties included the weekly invention of new systems designed to encourage children to return toys to where they belong, systems which of course were destined to failure, but the pursuit of which kept me gainfully employed for almost a year. (That and cleaning out the fridge, a household item which again had the long-term-employment-friendly characteristic of re-building the pool of water on the bottom shelf and re-messing up the neat ordering of food items on a weekly basis)
5 Miles McClagan // Nov 10, 2008 at 5:09 pm
So that’s what happened to my Leech He-Man figure…Mum said it was sent to a farm…
6 lill // Nov 10, 2008 at 6:59 pm
Can they be adapted to deal with teenager’s mess? Clothing, arty stuff and books mostly?
7 Ben // Nov 10, 2008 at 7:30 pm
I think I need one. I think the Happy Meal toys are starting to plot against me.
8 PrimroseRoad // Nov 11, 2008 at 12:30 am
Can these be used for students rather than toys?
*ahem* I meant student ESSAYS. I swear I did.
9 betty slocombe // Nov 11, 2008 at 9:38 am
Somewhat overengineered, I feel; what’s wrong with the bin? I used to have a cleansing when Frannie was at creche / school, and then dummy up whenever she asked about any item as in ” well if you can’t keep track of your things I don’t know why you expect me to know where they are……hahha hehe…..I never ever threw a book away though.
10 squib // Nov 11, 2008 at 11:12 am
Comrade Daisk, well that’s just stiff bickies
Miles may the power of grayskull be with you
Lill I’m working on an industrial strength one for teenagers
Ben maybe you should just let them. Ben10 rhymes and he has alien powers and he’s way cooler than you
PR yes to both questions!
Betty I love putting books in there, especially Disney princess books and anything involving Barbie and her dribbling paramour Skovoola
11 franzy // Nov 11, 2008 at 3:02 pm
The line between practical and evil is drawn by the right kind of public relations.
TOO MANY KITTENS!!! OPEN THE KITTEN BOX!!!
BBBRRRRRRRNNNNYYYYAAAWWWWfutfutfutfut
“Mummy, what’s this downy stuff in the garden?”
12 Andy Pants // Nov 11, 2008 at 3:07 pm
Unfortunately not even the fires of Mount Doom could put an end to the paranormal evil of Twilight novel. It’s utter awfulness would be like some kind of supernatural spell that protects it from any crude method of destruction.
Although a silver dagger dipped in ox blood might work.
13 squib // Nov 11, 2008 at 3:22 pm
One for you Andy:
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Twilight
14 matilda doolittle // Nov 11, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Your idea reminds me of the famous murder case in America where the airline pilot found his flight attendant wife laying around on the floor (after he killed her) and deposited her in a woodchipper resulting in her exit (much like your invention) as mulch.
Luckily (or unluckily for him) the woodchipper missed a finger nail that had the wife’s unique nail polish on it and he was apprehended, convicted and resides in prison to this day.
Yeah, so, the disposal of toys, spouses, etc. found laying around on the floor is not a new idea, but I won’t discourage you from applying for a patent.
15 warthog // Nov 11, 2008 at 10:58 pm
Get a decent train set and load up the rest of the toys into the wagons for a journey to Cupboard Junction.
I recommend Garden Guage.
16 squib // Nov 12, 2008 at 8:27 am
Wow thanks for the gruesome details Til
Wart don’t you find that after you’ve watched the train go round and round and round that you’ve seen all there is to see?
17 warthog // Nov 12, 2008 at 12:37 pm
yes
so?
18 Joe // Nov 13, 2008 at 11:52 am
I read a parenting book where the author recommended raking toys into a big heap in the corner of their kids’ room. Our daughter happily picked away at the edges over the day, never minding that none of the bits went together or that everything was mixed up all over again every night. It worked well for a while but then we moved to a place that is too small to wield a rake and to accommodate the heap (which has grown). In fact I think our place is small enough to qualify as a toy house so perhaps we don’t have to remove anything. But for bigger places I recommend a wide plastic rake. It also gives shag pile carpet a nice ploughed look.
19 squib // Nov 13, 2008 at 12:08 pm
I like that idea
Dear New Inventors, I would like to submit a rake…
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