poetsquib.com

There have been plenty of audacious plans for the Perth/Fremantle area in recent years; a 3700 km canal, a snow park, a giant Ferris wheel, and six artificial islands. But have any of you heard of the exciting and bold plan to build a mountain just off Cottesloe?

A consortium of Perth A-listers called Better Peaks plans to build the world’s highest mountain at 8,849 metres high. They have already taken out a ten year sand supply contract with the South Australian Government, whereby all available sand in that state will be shipped by barge and offloaded into the Indian Ocean, just past Cottesloe’s iconic pylon

Better Peaks concept spokesperson Monty Bluffle, shoelace mogul and mountaineering enthusiast, claims the Better Peaks Mountain will be sustainable and carbon free. ‘You can’t get more natural than a mountain,’ he said. ‘They are very wholesome and bracing’

‘Perth is a world-class city and it needs a world-class mountain. Quite frankly the hills have not been up to scratch for a long time now.’ Mr Bluffle went on to say that just like the Perth Entertainment Centre, the Darling Scarp was getting old and past its prime

‘Yes there will be some ungrateful guttersnipes and beastly naysayer types who won’t share my vision to mountainise the sea but what they need to realise is they are spoiling my big alpine joyfest, which is really selfish of them,’ he finished by saying